


late night piano

by smiling_sunflowers



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:34:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27057286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smiling_sunflowers/pseuds/smiling_sunflowers
Summary: It's time for Logan to go to sleep... but where is that music coming from?
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	late night piano

Logan would have no hesitation in listing the various negative effects, both biological and psychological, lack of sleep could cause. He was quite adamant in his belief that Thomas needed to create and maintain an adequate and consistent sleep schedule. Regarding himself, however, that was another story entirely.

That being said, it was quite late, or perhaps rather early, when Logan finally decided to retire into his room from his reading. It was around 3 AM by Logan's approximation, though that could very well be inaccurate, as time seemed to blend together at these hours of the night, likely due to Thomas's unconsciousness.

Logan enjoyed the night. In the day, there always seemed to be something or someone who would get in the way of his work. Some issue needing resolution, some hijinx the others would get themselves into. There was always something. But the night, on the other hand, was peaceful. There were no interruptions in the night, which helped to increase efficiency in doing whatever he so chose. He often found it hard to go to bed, thinking about all of the things he was unable to complete during the chaos of the day. So he stayed awake while everyone else was asleep, which left him alone with his thoughts, his work, and his books. It was nice, and it was quiet.

Well, rather, it was usually quiet. This particular night, though, the silence was not absolute. The sound was slight; had his ears not adjusted to the silence previously enveloping him, there would be no way for Logan to notice. However, the long hours he had spent with Thomas's various books and knowledge caused the adjustment to settle quite nicely, and, in turn, it did not take long in the hall for Logan to notice the faint medley of chords. The sound was muffled, as if he was listening from underwater, but Logan could still tell that it was being played with a passionate intensity.

Curiosity peaked, Logan began toward the sound. He walked slowly, not wanting any noise he may make to interrupt the music, which he determined to be classical, flowing from its unknown source. As he walked closer, Logan became better able to distinguish the different aspects of the music from one another. He could hear the richness of the chords as chord progressions layered underneath an intricate melody pattern of a higher pitch.

His search for the music's source led him to one of the other sides' rooms. This made sense enough - their rooms were quite good at muffling noise but never quite covered it completely. What surprised Logan, however, is that he found himself at the door to Virgil's room. He found this odd, as Virgil's typical music taste seemed to be punk, rock, and emo. Virgil listening to classical music contradicted this pattern; however, Logan had always had a fondness for classical music, among other genres, so he was glad Virgil shared his appreciation for it.

Logan stood outside Virgil's door, considering what to do next. There was no real reason for him to do anything. It would make sense for him to simply go to his own room and allow Virgil to continue listening to his music. But for some reason, Logan found himself wanting to talk to Virgil. He had nothing to say to him in particular, yet there he was, standing outside his door, listening to the classical piece being so fervently played while trying to think of a way to make his presence known to Virgil without startling him too much.

After a short while, the chords were crunchy before resolving in a chord that held a sense of finality. Then, there was a pause in the music which Logan decided was a good time for him to knock. So he did, with three precise, even knocks. The next section of the piece that had been starting to play abruptly came to a stop. The silence that Logan had previously become accustomed to suddenly felt jarring.

Logan waited a moment, expecting Virgil to say something, but the silence held. He considered what he could say after knocking on his door at three in the morning in the middle of a complicated classical piano piece. He settled on a quiet "Virgil?".

He heard footsteps, the turn of a lock and, then, the door handle, before the door quietly opened, a timid, and clearly surprised, Virgil peeking out. "Logan?"

The logical trait knew it wasn't really a question of who but rather of why, yet he still responded as if it were the former. "Yes."

"Did you..." Virgil considered what to say to his unexpected visitor, "Did you hear the music?"

"Yes. I came to investigate, as the sound is unusual for this time of night."

"I'm so sorry," he apologized, "The room's soundproofing is usually enough to block it from the other rooms when I play, but I guess, tonight, it was a little louder than usual."

Logan processed Virgil's statement for a moment before asking, "I'm sorry, did you say when you 'play'?"

Virgil opened his mouth to say something but found nothing coherent coming out. "Um... I...." He took a breath before answering Logan with a simple "yeah".

“Oh.” A beat of silence. Logan was confused, to say the least. “Well, it was exquisite playing.”

Virgil looked down to the floor. “Um, thanks, I guess. I don’t know if it was really, but… that’s nice of you to say.”

"Can I come in for a little bit?" Logan had been ready to head off to his own room for the night, but, suddenly, he was feeling very awake. And for a reason he couldn't quite pinpoint, he really wanted Virgil's company at the moment.

“Um… I guess…" Virgil opened his door the rest of the way so that Logan could enter.

Virgil's room was just as darkly themed as Logan remembered. In fact, the majority of his room was just as Logan remembered, though the design choices seemed more tasteful to Logan than he had thought the last time he came here. There was only one noticeable difference to his memory: a beautiful grand piano, sat in the room's center.

Logan's focus immediately narrowed to the piano, and he began taking small steps toward it. The piano was a sleek black, fitting for the room's color scheme, and looked so well maintained it could be brand new. Logan reached a hand toward it but hesitated. He looked to Virgil for permission. Virgil nodded, so Logan placed a finger on the piano's surface, dragging it across as if he could somehow gain knowledge of its artistry through touch. His finger reached the keys, and he gently pushed one down, letting the note ring softly. The piano may have looked brand new, but from the ease of pressing the key, Logan could tell this piano had been played countless times before. As Logan released the note, Virgil told him, "That's an A. Pretty fitting choice for you, teach."

Logan turned back to face him. "I..." He was at a momentary loss for words. "I didn't know you played."

“Yeah, well…” Virgil walked up beside Logan to join him at the piano. “Then I guess I’ve been doing a pretty good job of hiding it ‘til now.”

"Why would you want to keep something like this from us? You're so talented." That statement made Virgil cringe a bit, though Logan hadn't the slightest idea why. Based on the playing Logan had listened to through the door, he considered his statement on Virgil's talent to be not an opinion but a clear fact. When Virgil said nothing in response, he continued, "How have I never heard you play until now?"

"I, um... I only really play at night, so no one can hear," Virgil explained, "I'm up late a lot of the time; it's hard for me to sleep, y'know?"

“Yes, I… do believe I understand that.”

"But, now, I guess I need to reevaluate that, huh? I mean I knew that my playing was a bit louder than normal, but I still didn't think it could reach your room. Now I've gone and woken you up. I'm so sorry about that, again, really."

Hearing the guilt in his voice, Logan was quick to correct him. "Oh, no need to apologise, Virgil. You didn't wake me up."

“Huh?’

"I've been awake," he explained, "I heard your playing from the hall, and it most likely never reached my room."

Virgil looked at him in surprise and joked, "Mr. Sleep Schedule staying up late? What were you even doing?"

"Well, you have your piano. I have my books. And when you have time like this, because it seems that neither of us are getting decent sleep, why not use it? After all, some things are just easier to do alone, when nobody else is around."

"Huh." Virgil thought for a moment. "Maybe we have more in common than I thought, Logan."

“Perhaps.”

They stood there, neither sure what to say further. Logan shifted his weight from foot to foot. He had spent hours previously without sound. Why did it suddenly feel so... unsettling? He needed to do something to break the silence. "So," Logan queried, "what caused you to pursue the piano?"

"Oh. Well, I started playing as something to do when I was up by myself," Virgil answered, "And I actually found that it worked pretty well to calm my thoughts down. So now, I use it a lot to distract myself when they start to become... overwhelming."

"That would make sense, huh? But it actually gave me something to focus on, out of my own head. And at this point, the notes to most of these songs come naturally to me anyway since I've played them so many times." He took a seat at the piano bench. "Besides, I really only play the crazy notey stuff when my thoughts are getting real bad. Those thoughts are loud, so I gotta drown them out."

At that, Logan felt a rise of concern. "That last piece you were playing seemed to have quite a bit of notes in it."

Virgil was quiet for a moment before saying, “I guess…”

Logan waited for him to continue and, when he didn’t, started to speak, “If you want to talk about it -”

“No,” Virgil stated rather sharply, “I’m dealing with it… I’m Anxiety. No one else should have to deal with these thoughts but me.”

“Virgil, that’s not true. If you need somebody to talk to, I’m here.”

"No, I don't want to talk about it with anyone. The whole point of being up at night is to be alone, remember?" Logan watched Virgil's hands begin to fidget. "In fact, maybe you should go. I think I've already put a little too much of myself out there tonight."

“Virgil," Logan said firmly to ensure his attention before shifting to a softer tone, "I can tell you're dealing with a lot right now. You don't have to be alone for that."

"I want to be alone." The harsh tone of his voice took Logan aback. It almost sounded like one of his hisses. Logan normally found it quite humorous when Virgil hissed but being on the receiving end left him with a different reaction.

Logan felt a pang of... well, of what he couldn't quite decide, but a pang in his chest. He sighed. "Okay. I'll... I'll go. Good night, Virgil." And with that, Logan slowly made his way to the door.

“Wait.”

Logan paused, letting his hand rest against the door frame. He turned to meet eyes with Virgil, who was now looking at him with guilt and a small sort of desperation.

“I’m sorry. Stay. Please…” 

Logan’s eyebrows furrowed slightly. “But I thought you said…”

"I... I do want to be alone, but..." Virgil sighed, "I also don't want to be by myself. Not now."

Logan changed his direction back toward Virgil. "I don't understand. Do those two phrases not mean the same thing? How can you be alone if I stay here?"

A whisper of a chuckle escaped Virgil's lips. "You're right. It sounds pretty stupid when I say it out loud. It doesn't really make much sense." A pause and, then, another sigh. "You can go. I - I don't know what I'm saying."

“No, I can stay if you want me to. I just want to understand.”

“You and me both.”

Logan sat beside Virgil on the piano bench, neither saying anything more because, quite simply, what more could either think to say? Virgil's hands once again returned to the keys and, with great hesitancy, began to push them down. He didn't play the same piece that he had been before when he had originally caught Logan's attention. This piece was softer, gentler.

Logan shut his eyes, allowing himself to be engulfed by the music. The piece was definitely less complicated than the previous one, but that simply gave Virgil more room to emote through his playing. Logan swayed as the notes sweetly flowed together and the dynamic shifted from a mid range, perhaps a mezzo piano, to a forte. It was stronger but still maintained its gentle tone.

The piece continued for a few minutes more before ending on a piano open chord to finish. Logan kept his eyes closed, recounting the piece in his mind and just trying to soak in the calm it gave him.

What caused Logan to eventually open his eyes was Virgil's voice, which was quiet, as though speaking any louder would break something that was invisible to both of them yet very present. "I... I think I might understand the difference. Between being alone and being by myself I mean."

“Oh?” Logan asked, “What is it?”

Virgil considered for a moment about how to phrase his thoughts. "Well... Alone is peaceful. It's easy because you don't have to worry about anybody else. Which can be nice. It’s a choice.

"But by yourself? That's scary. It's like... being trapped. But there's nothing trapping you. There’s no option, I guess? To have someone to lean on. And that sucks. When I think about it’s kind of like... a field that you can't see the end of. And you're just standing there. By yourself. And there's no one there to like... hold your hand, and say 'Hey, let's get out of this dumb field.'"

Logan just kind of stared at him, trying to piece it together. "That..."

“I know. I know, it doesn’t make any sense, but -”

“No," Logan interjected, "that actually does make sense. I think the visual helped. And I just want to say that... Well... I can leave you alone, and still hold your hand at the same time." He took Virgil's hand. "See?"

"Yeah..." Virgil said, his lips quirking up into a small smile, "Maybe... we could be... alone together?"

An intriguing choice of words, one that contented Logan in a way most oxymorons could not by the very nature of their attempt to connect two conflicting ideas in a manner that he normally found quite contrived. "Have you, by chance, payed a visit to Emile lately?"

Virgil laughed. “Yeah, actually. I’m surprised you caught the reference.”

“It was well used,” Logan told him, which made Virgil’s smile widen. “Alright then. Alone together it is.”

After that, Logan and Virgil spent a lot of their sleepless nights together. Virgil would play the piano while Logan sat beside him, reading. They enjoyed their alone time, but they enjoyed it together. And whenever either of them decided they wanted to be a little less alone, all they had to do was reach out a hand.

Logan enjoyed the night. It was a time he could spend without the interruptions of the countless shenanigans that ensued during the day. But, for him, the night had changed. It was still peaceful and he still had his thoughts, his work, and his books. The difference, now, however, was that he had someone to share it with. It was nice, and it was not quiet but, rather, filled with classical piano music which Logan came to find he quite preferred.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! it's my first fic I'm posting here. I hope you enjoyed it :)


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